You Got Valentine’s Day All Wrong

love-1662880_1280You got it all wrong: Valentine’s Day is not about chocolate, flowers and fancy dinner.

The thing we love about Valentine’s Day is it’s the one day of the year to slow down and think about LOVE.

Do you remember when you were a kid at school and you wrote a valentine to everybody in your classroom? You tried to think about one nice thing to say about everyone. How great was it to find the one kind thing you could say about everyone you came in contact with on a daily basis? When you slow down, you know you can find one nice thing to say about everybody. And when you started saying nice things about other people, you started to feel better about yourself and have a more optimistic point of view. Plus, you showed them love—and not everyone gets enough of that in today’s distracted, disruptive world.

So, that’s what Valentine’s Day is about to us: it’s taking one day a year and remembering to love and appreciate other people. While you might not be passing out valentines to everyone you come in contact with on a regular basis, there’s nothing wrong with writing down one thing you like about the people around you and dropping them a little note. It makes them feel better, it makes you feel better and it takes the pressure off of having the perfect Valentine’s Day.

Happy Valentine’s Day– we appreciate YOU!

xo,
Gene & Julie

© Gene & Julie Gates and Working Couple Network, 2017. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Gene & Julie Gates and Working Couple Network with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

These Seeds Don’t Work

orange-1117645_1280A guy goes to his friend’s house, and he’s starving. He sees a huge orange tree in the backyard and notices it’s loaded with fruit. His friend is never hungry because every day he gets up and grabs beautiful oranges off the tree and eats them.

So the guy asks, “How in the world did you get these oranges?”

His friend replied, “It’s really simple. Inside the oranges I found these seeds. I planted these seeds, and now I have all the oranges I could possibly eat!”

The guy thinks, “I’ll never be hungry again!” He runs home, plants the seeds in the ground and goes to bed.

The next morning he runs outside, excited to see his tree full of big beautiful oranges. But there’s nothing there. That’s when the guy realizes he was ripped off: these seeds don’t do anything. These seeds don’t work!

What the man didn’t know is that the seeds DO work. They just take patience. In time, he would have a big beautiful tree. And from that tree, and the many oranges that are produced, he would have an orchard. Then he could share bounty from that orchard with another friend who had an apple orchard. And he could share with a person who had chickens with eggs. He would have almost anything in life he could want.

It all started with one orange seed.

A lot of us are like that. We get frustrated when things aren’t taking root quickly enough. In your romantic relationship there may have been an initial burst of fireworks, but did respect show up overnight? No, you planted the seeds of respect.

orange-166982_640The seed of kindness was planted when you truly listened with compassion as she shared her problems at work. The act of service seed was planted when you enthusiastically helped him move all the boxes into his new apartment without complaining. These tiny seeds of respect will mature into a mighty orchard over the years. But it doesn’t happen overnight.

What seeds are you planting in your relationship today? Be aware that the actions and words you exchange with your partner today are planting your relationship of tomorrow. Are you planting kindness and respect? Or frustration and dissatisfaction?

These seeds DO work! Choose your seeds wisely.

 

© Gene & Julie Gates and Working Couple Network, 2017. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Gene & Julie Gates and Working Couple Network with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

How to Keep the Romantic Spark Alive

Gene & Julie Gates on the set of KTXD's "Texas Living" with Hilary Kennedy.
Gene & Julie Gates on the set of KTXD’s “Texas Living” with Hilary Kennedy.

Sometimes it’s difficult to keep that relationship spark alive when you’re a Working Couple since you have so many balls bouncing and you don’t have a lot of free time.  However, it’s crucial you take good care of your romantic relationship as it is also the cornerstone of your professional life.  We shared a few of our tips on how to keep the spark alive on KTXD’sTexas Living” with Hilary Kennedy.  Click to view– we hope it helps!  Feel free to add your tips in the comments section, too.  Here’s to a ROMANTIC New Year!    Segment on KTXD/Texas Living “How to Keep The Spark Alive”

 

Twilight is Good for Your Marriage

TwilightIs your marriage losing its spark?  We have one word for you: Twilight.  If you want to recapture the sensations of falling in love, read the Stephenie Meyer books and watch the films together.  You will awaken the electricity that you thought was dormant in your marriage…  it worked for us.  🙂  Hear about our Twilight experience in this week’s Relationship Report Card.  Ooh la la!

With Love,
Gene & Julie
Founders, Working Couple Network

© Gene & Julie Gates and Working Couple Network, 2011. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Gene & Julie Gates and Working Couple Network with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What is Your Love Language?

The 5 Love Languages

What makes you feel loved?  Is it a note left on the bathroom mirror?  A kiss goodbye?  We are enthusiastic believers of Dr. Gary Chapman’s theory that we all have a primary love language… the way we feel most loved.  The 5 Love Languages are Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch.  This concept gave us an “ah ha” moment when we realized different things made us feel like we were loved and appreciated.  If Physical Touch is your partner’s love language, it won’t matter how many times you send flowers… your partner won’t feel loved.  Sending flowers is fantastic for the person whose love language is Receiving Gifts, but a foot massage will work magic for the person who craves Physical Touch.  Early in our relationship we devoured Dr. Chapman’s book and took his quiz… it created terrific results because we were able to find ways to show love to each other in ways that the other person received it.  Dr. Chapman says, “Many husbands and wives who had spent years struggling through marriages they thought were loveless discovered one or both spouses had long been showing love through messages that weren’t getting through. By recognizing their different love languages, they witnessed the rebirth of the love they thought had been gone for good.”  Luckily for us, we have the same love language: Physical Touch… our challenge is finding a way to make that work between our busy career, family time and volunteer efforts… but that’s the topic of another blog.  🙂  So, here’s the 5 Love Languages quiz… what’s yours?  Better yet… what’s your partner’s?

With Love,
Gene & Julie
Founders, Working Couple Network

© Gene & Julie Gates and Working Couple Network, 2011. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Gene & Julie Gates and Working Couple Network with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.